Barrier
by me.be.NELZ
Summary: Cammie has been through a lot. She's been through many foster homes. Will this home be the one where her barrier comes down?
1. Chapie 1

_Hi Grant, how are you today?_ I sat in the car, driving to my new foster home. _I miss you, Grant_, I thought bitterly. If they took him, they should have taken me too. Those damn Circle of Caravan people.

"Cammie, sweetie, we're here," my agent called from up front. I just stared back at her. Slowly I got out of the door. _They're trying to get me to try another home_, I told Grant.

We walked up to the door and Mary Ann, my agent, rang the doorbell. The door was opened wide and a woman with a nice smile answered the door. "You must be Cameron," she told me. No shit, Sherlock. I nodded my head in response. _This one seems friendlier, but I'm sure it will end just the same_. A few faces popped up. There was a girl and two boys. _You would probably be talking about how 'hot' this girl is_, I told Grant. He always had this little thing for flirting. I became more stiff, no emotion portraying on my face. "Come in," she ushered. I glanced at Mary Ann and she made the motion for me to follow. Well this was it. I walked in and I was looking for exits. _What if they come for me Grant? How will I get out? But if it means I can be with you up there, I'd take it any day._ She gave me a smile and my face stayed emotionless. Why do I even try anymore? I stared blankly back at her and she shifted uneasily. Finally she started to talk.

"Cameron, this is my daughter, Bex. And these are her friends Jonas and Corbin," the foster lady told me. She hasn't even introduced herself. _I remember when you used to tease me about my manners._ "Oh, and my name is Rachel. You can call me mom though sweetie." I looked between Rachel and Bex. They had nothing in common. She must be adopted too. _You would be laughing at me and calling me Captain Obvious, your voice is ringing through my head_. Bex was pretty, she had long pretty hair. She had an athletic figure, and let me tell you, she's in shape. She would definitely be in the field if she was a spy. She looked as if she were dying for adventure. I looked over at the boys.

"Hi, I'm Jonas," one of them said. He had black hair. He was tall and skinny. He would definitely be into the studies.

"And I'm Corbin," the other one said. Well gee, what other boy was there? He also had black hair, but it was longer, a little past his eyebrows and ears. He was taller than the other boy, and he was more flushed out. He looked like he would be in field. _I could still take anyone of them down, even if you tell me not to_. I'm sure Grant would scold me for even thinking of taking down a regular citizen.

But he's not with me.

I shuddered and tried to keep myself resolved, but I knew that they all saw. I shook my hair so it would cover my face and glanced up. They were all staring at me. I kept my head hung low. I didn't want them to see me. I wanted to disappear and become the Chameleon, like we used too. _But I have a different life now_. And beside, I was the main reason we were gathered in by their front door.

"I should warn you," Mary Ann softly spoke from beside me, "she lost someone very special to her. She's very touchy about stuff, and she almost never speaks." I could hear a pin drop it was so quiet. Had they never had an orphan come before? _Grant, I wish you were here_. "She's also very paranoid. Oh, she can disappear at almost anytime she wants so keep a good eye on her if things are… 'tight'," Mary Ann stupidly went on. God, how stupid is she? _She'll give me away someday, Grant. She'll tell everyone I'm an ex-spy, and then the secret will be out. In fact she just told them I love to hide. But it doesn't matter. I always came out on top during hide-and-seek._

Rachel tried to give me a reassuring smile, but it was more for herself I was sure. _'Cause no body wants me anymore. No one liked me but you_. I grimaced at those thoughts.

Grant _was_ the **only** ONE who understood me.

The ONE and **only**.

"Let me show you your room," she said softly, and started to walk. Mary Ann pushed me toward her, and the kids were still staring at me like I was their new toy. I glared back at Mary Ann and then reluctantly followed Rachel. After I passed the kiddies they followed me. They looked around my age, but I guessed they hadn't matured yet.

I walked up the stairs and I shuddered again. _These stairs remind me of the first time I met_. Everything came rushing to me and I fell on the stairs, scared to walk on. I heard the shouting, but everything sounded so distant to me. I only could remember the memories of that time we first met.

I was walking up the stairs behind a woman. _I was positive it was my mother, but I was just so scared I couldn't remember_. She was taking me to a room, and I was shrinking in fear. She told me I was one of the best, and I was a truly amazing individual for being called to the 'chief' at age 10. I thought it was a death trip.

All I knew was I was being separated from my family, and that what I was going to do was dangerous, much more than my earlier tasks. I was walking up the stairs, hand-in-hand with my mother.

I was scared.

I was 10.

Then suddenly I felt a wind go by me and a blur running up the stairs.

"Grant! YOU SLOW DOWN NOW!" I heard a man bellow from behind me. I saw you screech to a halt and fall forward, but catch yourself with your hands. Then you righted yourself and turned around to grin.

"My name is Grant!" you cheerfully told me. So honest I had not a doubt you were honestly happy to see me. And that was pretty good. I _was_ wearing a lie-detecting ring. But those things never work anyways. "What's your name?" you asked just as cheerfully. _I miss you, Grant!_ I screamed in my head.

_How am I supposed to live without my right hand man?_

"My name is Marie," I told you with a straight face. Everything was so flawless that you would have never known that it was a lie. I wasn't going to give out personal information to some stranger. Then you grinned even wider. I knew you knew.

"That's a lie," you smiled. "Don't bother to try and cover up. You're Cammie Morgan, the famous for being infamous."

_Infamous_.

_Infamous_.

_Those words haunt me, Grant_.

"I already looked up information on you," you sheepishly told me. I gawked while the man behind me yelled at you.

"Grant! How many times have I told you not to break into the database? Just because you can doesn't mean you should!" but you just smiled even more, proud of the fact that nothing could stop you. Proud for being stubborn. _Proud for being a spy_.

_And you had a right to be proud, Grant. You were an amazing spy_.

But your smile made me smile. It made me feel safe. I knew then that this mission was going to be a little easier. I knew that you were going to be my partner. _I knew that you would keep me safe_.

_But it's not fair, Grant. It's not fair that you left, and didn't take me with._

_I thought we did everything together._

After that, we were best friends. We went on so many missions together. We were treated like little kids, even though we were secret agents. They never had a clue. _We were good partners_. _I won't ever have a partner, or if I do, they won't be anything like you_.

We saved each other's asses so many times, we stopped trying to compete. _All I know is that we were so close. We always had each other's backs. To the very end_.

That's when I felt someone touch me. I immediately jumped away, my face emotionless. You can call it my poker face. I looked up and saw that Bex was looking at me with so much worry it was as if she was my friend since I was 12. But that's not possible. She would have been in sixth grade, probably starting seventh. And I would have been in the field.

My eyes darted between everyone around me. Everyone had worry in their eyes. It was honest. It wasn't just some fake 'are you hurt'. It was really worry.

I still couldn't trust them.

"Cammie," Mary Ann softly said, "it's okay." _Yeah, you haven't been through what I've been through_. Then she got everyone up and acted as if nothing ever happened. Thanks Mary Ann… We continued up the stairs and then we got to the top. The hall was so big. _Remember Blackthrone Grant? It looks just like the corridors_.

"I hope you don't mind sharing Bex's room," Rachel told me. _She probably worries about me and thinks I'll do something stupid. The only thing I would do is run away. But they would catch me. They've tightened things up, Grant. Ever since you_. She pushed open the door and suddenly an arm was linked with mine.

"I hope you don't mind me!" Bex said in a British accent. _Should have seen that one coming. I guess I'm losing my touch. They haven't put me in the field since you_. "We share a bunk bed, so just tell me which one you prefer," she went on. I walked in and it was so strange. Everything was so light, nothing like the usual homes I go to. But I liked dark rooms. It was easier to do things in secrecy. Maybe that was the point of a light room. _Or to lighten up the mood_, I can just hear you chiming in. _it feels like you're with me every second. I'll never forget you_.

"I usually sleep on the bottom, but you can have it if you want," she told me. I didn't miss the little bit of hope that I would take the top. The boys walked in and Mary Ann dropped my duffle bag in the room. Jonas sat in her chair by the desk and opened Bex's laptop. _That's a safe assumption_. Corbin sat on the ground and leaned up against the wall. I walked over and grabbed my bag and threw it on the top bunk. Bex got up and hugged me. I stiffened, but she took no notice.

"Thank you SOOOO much! I know this is really embarrassing but I'm terrified of heights." Lie.

"Don't try and cover up. You just prefer the bottom one more," Jonas called from the computer. I saw Bex pull away from me and glared at Jonas. "Come on, Bex, even _I_ could see through that one."

"What's your favorite movie?" she asked me eagerly, giving me her full attention. Too bad I didn't want it.

"She doesn't talk idiot," Corbin called. I wanted to glare at him, but he actually listened to Mary Ann. Bex looked over at him, and I assumed she gave him a glare also. _It's never safe to assume, Chameleon, I can hear you say_. "Did you even listen to that Mary Ann lady?"

"Well anyways," she said dismissing the two boys who just seemed to love to contradict her, "my favorite movie is James Bond-"

"'Cause you want to be a spy, yada yada yada," Corbin finished for her. She wanted to be a spy? _She'd need to get better at lying_, I snickered in my head. Then there was a knock on the door. When had it shut? _You're losing your touch_. I grimaced at the thought. But then I realized that everyone moved. Jonas spun around and hid the laptop somewhere, Corbin was on the floor on his back arms over his face. And Bex flew back on her bed, humming. The door opened and Rachel came in.

"Well it looks like you kids are bored." They all looked at her with the 'no duh' face. No respect… or maybe that's just how kids are these days. "School starts soon you know, you should do something fun." At school they all groaned. _School… what a boring place. It reminds me of all those missions when we had to watch over a certain kid to make sure they would stay safe._

"What do you propose we do then, Mom?" Bex asked. Rachel just shrugged.

"I just thought I'd let you kids know that school is right around the corner. Maybe you should do something fun to kick off the school year. Or do something for summer ending." They all stared at her. _What are their problems_? "Well you kids think," she said, then left. As soon as her footsteps where no longer heard, everyone went back to what they were doing or where they were before.

"Usually when Mom comes up she takes us somewhere if we're bored… Guess not this time," Bex told me. Wow, what boring people. I could tell already. They had nothing in store. So that's how my first day really went. Just 'chilling' with my 'new' friends and family. I wonder how long this family will keep me.

I found out Jonas was the computer geek just like I thought he would be. But he was way talented. _Even you would be impressed, Grant. I bet he could've broken into the database, just like you_. But he wasn't exactly a geek if you know what I mean. He was just super incredibly smart. Bex would make up some equation that looked impossible to solve. Who knew if there _was_ even an answer. But he would find one, using only his head. _He's good, even I would need paper for that one_. He typed fast and he could fast read. He would be perfect for study. _Too bad he's not a spy_.

Corbin is strong. I'll give him that. _Don't get mad or jealous, Grant. He's really strong_. I'm pretty sure he was showing off, but when he was lying on his stomach, Bex sat on him. He decided that then and there he was going to work out and do push ups with her on his back. They were quick, efficient, and perfect. He was quick, and I'm sure he would have a good person to lead sneak attacks. _But that's just the spy in me thinking_.

Bex is just Bex. She's loud, obnoxious, and daring. I'm not afraid to say that she did jump out the window because there was a snake in the room. She ran back up laughing. I knew that NO ONE could be THAT gullible. She is adventurous, always looking for something dangerous. I'm not sure if that's a good thing though. But she reminds me of you. A girl version of you.

_I miss you, Grant._

_I can't get over losing you. Everything reminds me of you these days._


	2. Chapie 2

So after a while (it was more like 11 at night) the boys finally left. I was lying down and resting in the bed while I could, it was pretty comfortable. I was about to go to sleep when, of _course_, Bex had to speak up.

"So why do you where a hoodie 24/7?" she asked. I realized I hadn't taken of my hood, but then again, I didn't want to. It was like my safety blanket; just something you don't want to do. So I shrugged and climbed up the steps to the bed. I laid down and I instantly felt tired. The bed was better than most beds I usually am forced to sleep on.

"Night, Cam," I heard Bex softly call, but I'm sure she hadn't meant me to hear it. It was the spy in me that heard it.

I thought over all the new people I met today. Maybe I'd stay here for a while. Then again I would have to see. I sighed and decided to sleep.

_G'night Grant._

"Cam wake up." I groaned and rolled over away from the voice. Suddenly I felt a hand on me and bolted up.

"Sorry," Bex murmured. I studied her face. She was very surprised, eyes wide. I calmed down and slumped; then rubbed the back of my head. She still had a surprised look on her face. After a while it just got old so I stared right back at her in the eye. Then she snapped out of it.

"Sorry," she muttered again and left the room. I watched after her but after I heard her go down the stairs I sighed and got out of bed. Just as I set my foot down the door flew open. I stood awkwardly in the center of the room putting on jeans, and stared blankly at the new face that appeared at the door.

"Sorry," the little girl blurted and shut the door. I quickly pulled up my jeans and put a baggier sweatshirt on. The hood was huge and I was sure it was going to cover my face. Slowly I walked out of the room, silently shut the door, and descended the stairs. I crept into the kitchen and no one noticed me. It was sort of embarrassing really. _Cammie, you were a __**spy**__ you're __expected__ to be __**a**__**b**__l__e__ to do that. _ I saw the little girl from earlier sitting at the table. She looked up, saw me, blushed and looked away.

She must be shy. _Never assume, Chameleon. How many times have I told you that?_ I cringed a little at Grant's comment. The reason I do not know. He was dead. But I could never get his voice out of my head.

"This is Tina," Bex introduced, pointing at the little girl. She was probably 7, small skinny, yet super sneaky. "She loves gossiping, and she's a major motermouth if you get on the right subjects. I bet you she'll be reporter when she grows up," Bex finished off. I looked at Bex after she said that mouthful, then looked at Tina. She was wearing the broadest smile I've ever seen.

It was sort of cute.

I quickly put that thought away and kept my face emotionless. Hopefully no one saw me loosen up, but from looking at everyone's expressions no one even took a hint. I pulled my hood further down, hopefully covering my whole face. The sweatshirt was pretty baggy as it is. _You're the __**chameleon**__, you can hide in anything - even if you were wearing a swimsuit in the middle of winter_. I grimaced as Grant's voice filled my head **again**. I walked over to the counter to grab a lunch that had my name on it, then started for the door.

But, being the lucky person I am, I saw the someone on the other side of the door and quickly dove for the corner between the door and the wall. The door was slammed open and whoever just came in left it open. I sighed, realizing how close I was to getting a door in my face. _You're too good to miss those little details,_ Grant's voice rang in my head. I slumped down and sat for a second - only to realize that everyone realized I was missing. I quickly dismissed myself and walked out the door. I was by the side walk when someone yelled, "SHE'S OUTSIDE!" Instantly I knew that they were looking for me. I turned around to see Corbin staring at me, while pointing his finger at me. We made eye contact and he slowly put down his arm. Slowly I saw him relax. For some damn reason I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

Something about him… was off…

I stood in the middle of the sidewalk while Bex came running out, running into Corbin full on. Yet somehow he didn't even _budge_. Now that's weird.

"Cam, where are you going?" Bex asked, a little scared. I pointed towards the school about 10 blocks down. It took up so much property, I could see it from here. Well that building was either the school or the town hall, but seeing all the children walk towards it and near it and by it and _in_ it, I thought it was pretty safe to assume it was the school. _Cameron, how many times have I told you already? __**It's never safe to assume**_. I shivered a little bit at the edge in Grant's voice, but he had a point. I should quit saying assume.

Because for a spy, assume is a dangerous word.

I sighed as I was ushered back into the kitchen and put in a chair.

"Where was she sweetie?" Rachelasked worriedly.

"She was on her way to… school," Bex replied, a little confused. Rewind, VERY confused.

"Honey, I give you all rides, you don't have to walk," Rachel told me. I shrugged. I actually liked walking. It gave me time to think to myself - _not that you don't already _Grant's voice mocked - and collect my thoughts. I sighed. I felt like Grant's voice was ringing throughout my head more than normal these days. Maybe he was trying to tell me something about this family. _Or maybe you're just completely insane_, this time my OWN voice spit out.

I sat in the chair while everyone got ready and finished up their morning routines. I felt someone staring at me, and I looked to the pitcher of water on the table. _Corbin_. I shivered a little bit. Something was off about him. Something was off about this WHOLE family. Suddenly my blood ran cold.

What if they were spies?

What if they were spies _for the other side_?

I internally smacked myself in the head. I needed to stop thinking up these crazy theories. I would be put in an asylum some day.

Finally everyone was ready and they all pilled out of the house. I was second to last, Rachel being last. She held the door open for me and gave me a sickly sweet smile. Almost fake. I told myself to quit picking up these little details, but it was hard not too. I was an ex-spy for Pete's sake. I slowly approached the huge van. How many people were crammed in there? I shuddered at the closed small space. I would MUCH rather be walking now.

Rachel urged me on, probably thinking we would be late. Something was off about this lady too. _SHUT UP_ I mentally yelled at myself. I made it to the door. All the 'kiddies' were in the back. Corbin and Jonas on either side of Bex, Tina in her lap.

"Where is Cammie going to sit? I don't want her to be left out." My eyes involuntarily widened under my hood. One, she was the first person to call me Cammie after Mary Ann left. Everyone else usually figured I didn't like that name, being all girly and me dressing so - so _un_girly.

When no one responded to her Tina huffed and took matters into her own hands. I heard her unbuckle the seatbelt and quietly walk to the seat next to me. I looked over and she clicked her seatbelt in, looked up at and gave me one of the biggest grins in the world.

"I'm Tina!" she restated. Her voice was high and cute, just like a little kid's should be. It was full of sincerity and honesty. "I love getting the new scoop on things! Like what's people's new favorite ice cream colors, who had birthday parties, who stole the crayons last week - oh that was horrible! Everyone was so sad! We didn't have crayons to color with! We had to use markers because the crayons were missing! It ended up the teacher next door stole them," she ended in a pout. She must really love her crayons. After a while she looked like she was about to cry - she must REALLY love her crayons. I stared at her, not really knowing what to do. I saw her eyes start to water up and I knew I had to do something. You can't just let a kid cry! I hesitantly put my hand on top of her head, and patted it almost reassuringly. She whipped her head in my direction. Her eyes were big with disbelief.

"YOU LISTENED TO ME!" she shouted so suddenly Rachel slammed on the brakes. The car was dead silent. Tina looked around wildly, taking everything in.

"You guys! She listened to me! Unlike you guys! Ugh! Cammie I'm so HAPPY you came!" she went off smiling so wide it would have made half the population smile.

Rachel went on driving after her sudden stop (and to the car horns blaring behind us) and the car ride was pretty quiet besides Tina's constant babbling.

We finally got to school and I jumped out of the car as soon as I could. "Cam," Rachel called. I walked over to her window which she was in the process of rolling down. "Good luck on your first day. I made sure that Rebecca-" "HEY! I HATE THAT NAME-" "was able to take you to all of your classes so you don't get lost. I'm sorry I couldn't get you two in the same classes," she told me with sincerity. So there was a honest side. Maybe she did care, but then I waved the thought from my head. I thought all the other homes cared too, but they didn't.

We walked towards the school and I felt all different kinds of eyes look at me. Maybe if I would have dressed like normal people did - "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT," I heard Corbin bellow from beside me. And just like that everyone dispersed.

Just. Like. That.

I looked over at Corbin and he was staring at me. We made another eye connection and he smiled at me. His first smile for me. It was as if he could read the gratitude in my eyes.

BUTTTT no, he wasn't a spy. Maybe he was just really good at reading people's emotions? I shook off the strange thoughts and walked into the school. Bex lead me to the main office and we got my schedule. She quickly explained the layout of the school to me incase we got departed.

_"There are four sides to this school. The one with the entrance is 1. Then it goes around clockwise, so that one -" she said pointing towards the left, "is 2, and that one-" she pointed to the right, "is four. The one opposite of the side we're in is 3. The floor levels are the first number. Like 3366. That's third level, third corridor, number 66. Easy enough?" I nodded in response to Bex's map. _

I lost her about a half a floor ago (stairs) and I was making my way towards my first class - Spanish. The bell went off 3 minutes 24 seconds ago, so I had 1 minute 56 seconds to find my class. I was already on the fourth floor, corridor 2. The halls were super crowded and I had to make sure I was going to get pounded into the wall right next to me. All the stupid football players were messing around and shoving each other - I was glad to get past that part of the hallway. I kept making my way down to 4289. Finally I got in and crept into an open seat by the end of a row. The boy 2 seats down from me didn't even realize I was there. Class started and our teacher came in 47 seconds late. But, of course, I wouldn't say that.

Everyone would think I was a freak.

Not that I wasn't already.

She quickly shredded off her jacket and went to the front.

"Me llamo Senora Calvit," she snapped. "Bienvenidos," she then smiled. Bipolar maybe? "You will not be taking these books home. You can use the online edition," she kept going. _What if we didn't own a computer?_ "Here are the books, you will grab one each morning you come in for class." Then the door burst open and a frantic looking Bex and an annoyed looking Corbin came in. "What?" Senora Calvit snapped. Bex's eyes scanned the room, and once she found me she looked back to Senora Calvit.

"Uh, Corbin got lost and I had to guide him," she replied back. Everyone else in the class snickered while Corbin rolled his eyes.

"Typical Bex. We all know that Corbin knows his way," the kid a few seats down murmured. I glanced over but then put my head down. I heard the door click and Senora Calvit went back to rambling on. I felt someone push my chair a little and I sat up immediately. I looked back and Corbin was pushing my chair in.

He quietly sat next to me and whispered, "Sorry, I wasn't anorexic enough to slide through." He gave me a small smile and then got situated. He but his backpack on the floor beside us and I heard the whispers.

I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil out of his bag then glanced up at him. He had an amused look . Obviously he didn't mind me taking his things them. I scribbled down the words 'why are people looking?' then folded it up and passed it to him. He was obviously pleased that he was the first person I was talking too. Not that I really had a choice. _You always have a choice, Cammie_ Grant's voice sang. I cringed a little, but let it slide. Suddenly I felt a little pressure on my leg and I looked down to find the note. I opened it up and it read 'no idea. I think everyone knows you're the new girl… but that's just a thought'. I quickly snatched the pencil on Corbin's desk back and wrote down my reply: 'is it too obvious?'. I flung it over and not even 30 seconds later it was back on my desk.

'Way too obvious'

The bell rang and I was out of the class in a flash. While I was roaming the halls I pulled out my schedule. **English: Room 4298**. I sighed and turned around. I made my way BACK to where I came from. _I should have looked at the stupid schedule sooner_. I looked up and saw Corbin. He saw me after 8 seconds and headed towards me.

"Hey, you can't keep disappearing like that," he told me as we walked towards _el ingles_. "Bex is worried sick." I waved him off, and he understood. "I'll tell her," he replied, smiled, then went the other way.

He read me.

Just. Like. That.

I was honestly a little dazed after that. _He understood me almost like you Grant. But of course never as well as you could_. I sighed and took a seat towards the back. The desks were arranged in a circle though so it would still be hard to stay hidden. The bell rang again and the whole class was present. Or at least all the desks were being used.

"Hello class," the teacher began in a friendly soft voice. She had a hint of an English accent in it. You could tell a lot by her voice and posture. She had a sweet smile that caressed her lips, and her voice was soft and nice. Her posture was upright, but her arms were open and inviting. _You can trust her_. My eyes widened involuntarily. It was Grant's voice… yet… I sat normally and kept my breathing in check, even though my heart was pounding like crazy.

"My name is Mrs. Anderson, and I will be your Advanced English teacher," she finished with a smile. Wait, advanced? Damn, Mary Ann must've had a part in my schedule planning.

"I will hand back your summer essays that you all sent in. Our goal is to improve your writing this year," she said happily. She really loved her job, you could tell. "My other goal is to get you all to become wonderful speakers!" she said a little more strongly, _still_ smiling. But she was staring at me. I could tell that I was her project for the trimester. This was going to be lovely. "But first let me give you my syllabus," she said walking gracefully back to her desk. She pulled out some papers and started handing them out. She went on talking about her background (her dad was from London, I knew she was part British) and what her requirements were. She also told us her expectations and what 'pieces of literature' we were going to be reading.

Finally after a _long_ 45 minutes the bell went off and we were free to leave. I got up along with the crowd and exited the room. I didn't want to get caught alone with our lovely teacher. All I know, she could make me stay there until I say something. Boy would that be along day.

I snaked my way through the hallway, only to stop where the lockers ended. I stopped and leaned against the locker as I heard all the students clamoring down the halls. I pulled out my schedule. **Pre. Calculus: 1124**. Just my luck. I had to go the complete opposite side of school. At least I was on the second floor. Realizing I only had 2 minutes and 59 seconds to get to my class - which was all the way around the school - I started speed walking. I really didn't want to be late. But it was better than having to walk around with Bex. I bumped into a couple people, most of them glaring at me, but got to class on time.

I sat in a spot by the window. _Four seconds to spare_. I silently counted down the time and as soon as I said zero the bell went off. The eternal clock is never off.

"Hello kids! I'm Mr. Robinson!" a man cheerfully stated. The whole class chuckled besides me. "Hey Derrick, did you get that hot girl from last year?" the whole class snickered as 'Derrick' muttered back a 'no'. Mr. Robinson went on to tease other students about their love life when he finally started to teach. He handed out his syllabus and books. Everyone in this class seemed more laid back and casual then my other classes. Must be the teacher. The class went on as I zoned in and out. I mostly stared out the window. It was a nice, bright day. The sun was shining and I could see all the little kids playing outside. _It can't be recess - it's only 10_. I thought. It was probably some thing because it's the first day of school. I watched them tango with the play structure when I saw Tina.

She was out there with a notebook and some sort of writing utensil. I couldn't see because it was too far away. I inwardly smiled as she walked up to random kids and teachers asking them something then writing it down. Before I knew it class was over and the bell went off. I gathered my stuff and headed out the door.

I pulled out my schedule and looked at my next class: World History: 3421. Ugh, another journey to the other side of school. I walked quickly as I made my way to the stairs, and then up the stairs. I finally got to the top and walked into class right as the bell rang. Five minute passing time was just not sufficient enough! I glanced over everyone sitting and saw a spot in the back. Lucky me.

I strode to the back and sat in the desk. The teacher walked in a second after me and started class. Of course, being the history teacher he is, he was horrible. So many history teachers were boring.

_But your father loved history didn't he?_ I kept a straight face again. I would not let these little 'Grant' sayings disturb me. But to answer his rhetorical question, yes, my father did love history

_"Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it"_

I sighed at the saying. It was almost the same for a spy. Whoever forgets what happened in a mission, they're most likely to come home MIA or KIA. Their pick I guess. But the good ones remember. They remember and study. The next time it comes around, they're prepared, and they won't go down. Or not as quickly. I needed to quit thinking about my dad. _But your dad was the only family member you remember. He's the only one you __had_. I shuddered at Grant's words. He had never been so blunt per say. He was always comforting. But as of now, it was as if he were pressuring me to do something.

That something I do not know.

Again as I got lost in my own thoughts, the bell went off. I was a little astounded to realize the class went by so quickly, but I often loose myself in thought. I grabbed all my books and this time pulled out my schedule _before_ I stepped out of the class. AP physics: 1121. I groaned as I had to make my way to the other side of the school _again_. Can they make the schedules anymore stupidly? Quickly I went out of the classroom and descended the stairs. Or as quickly as one could descend the stairs with a hoard of students in front of them.

Finally I was at the bottom and I ran through the hallways. My internal clock was telling me I only had 43 seconds, and I DIDN'T want to be late on my first day. Somehow I was able to sprint in and grab a seat before the bell went off. The sad thing? No one noticed me. Again. Inwardly I smiled to myself though. I still had my invisible charm. _You never lost it_, Grant's voice called. I was a little taken back, considering that was one of the NICER things he had said to me today.

Maybe the whole thing was whacky, that I heard Grant in my head. I mean a normal person didn't right? _You're not normal_. YES I know Grant, I bitterly replied. Great. Now I'm practically talking to myself. I quickly turned my attention to the teacher, hoping that he would distract me.

"Hello class! I know I'm the fourth class to get you, and that you've been through the whole syllabus thing already, but sorry kids, you're going to get it again." He started handing out papers while babbling on about world history. I could already tell he was a nimrod and that this was going to be a joke class. _It just means you're actually going to have to study_. I sighed at his words, but I knew Grant was right. _Cammie, you're already smart_. I was starting to freak out a little bit. He was answering me. I mean ANSWERING MY FREAKING THOUGHT. I shook it off. Grant was only there to protect me.

He was my best friend.

Finally the bell went off and I looked at my schedule:

Lunch


	3. Chapie 3

I sighed as I walked into the huge area. The noise level was crazy, and I heard laughter every where. I walked to the wall and quickly scanned the area for anyone I knew. No such luck. The cafeteria was just too big, there was no way I was going to spot anyone. One thing I did know what that I needed to get out of this room. I strode over to the door. Silently I crept out and into the lawn. People were everywhere still, laughing and going about their business. I walked over to an unoccupied tree and sat up against it. I closed my eyes and rested. Why did school have to be so stressful?

_Really Cammie? You think __**this**__ is stressful?_ I inwardly gave a sharp, heartless laugh. 'No' I thought back to Grant. 'Loosing you was stressful. Loosing you was everything.' I finished, thinking back to the time when they took you away from me.

That little time, when we were twelve.

"Cammie, I need you to run,"you told me. With a determined look on my face I refused. "Cammie," you said with more edge, "you need to be safe, you need to live." I stayed put.

We were in the laundry chute, waiting for the right moment to run. I remember we were debating whether to slide down the chute and face what was down there, rather than running out in the halls again. We had gotten the top secret information from the C.o.C. that we needed, but we had tripped off alarms.

"So much for twelve-year-olds being more capable than thirty-year-olds," you muttered as you pushed me down the chute. Down by the chute end we would be able to sprint out of the laundry closet and make a bee-line for the front doors.

That is if they weren't already guarded.

But of course, we had no such luck.

We shot down the chute and we heard the heavy footsteps of the men running to seal all exits. "Ventilation system?" I whispered in your ear. You gave a quick nod before we broke down the vent. Slowly we crawled through the vents, like all those cheesy spy movies. Sad thing was that it was a good escape though. I looked out the vents and saw nothing. I made space for you as you double-checked me. Then you kicked the vent open and we dropped to the ground.

Too bad they already had the area surrounded.

"Aw, think you would be getting far?" a sickly sweet voice called out. I saw a woman step out of the crowd of men with guns. One false move and you and I would be toast.

"Yeah, you guys were stupid enough to allow us to get the disk," you tried to be a smart ass.

"Yes now where is it," she snapped. It was so quick and orderly I almost peed my pants. I remember your face was pale too.

"We already gave it away," you whimpered. I realized that you were going for a i-am-innocent-don't-hurt-me-i-was-being-used, sort of deal.

"Lies," the lady slurred in your face. Then her hand whipped out and I saw you on the ground. I wanted to scream out, but I knew if I spoke I would say your name, and possible information we did not want them to know. I started towards you but a man pointed his gun at me.

"You only move when she instructs you too," the man coldly told me. I stared in desperation. My partner was being beat up.

I screamed when I heard the first shot.

Suddenly orders were being screamed out and everything was going hectic. The CIA was bringing in the back up. I started helping out when I realized you weren't at my back. I looked back to watch you battle the woman. I watched as you glared at her in hatred.

Then everything went in slow motion.

My body wouldn't move fast enough.

My mouth wouldn't open soon enough.

I watched as she pulled out a gun and shoot you, right into the shoulder.

Then into the stomach.

I got up as fast as I could, but it didn't seem fast enough. The woman was ripped away from you, but no one was able to tend you. I scrambled my way to you. Tears were dripping down my face.

I couldn't loose you Grant. It was thing that just couldn't happen.

I finally got to you and you looked terrible, pale, broken, angry- it was horrible.

"Grant," I said brokenly.

"Cammie," you wheezed out. You pulled out the disk and put in my hands. "Safe, Cam, safe." I stared at you as you started loosing consciousness. Then I got up and ran.

Ran until I couldn't run anymore.

Ran until I had no idea where I was.

Ran until the CIA was running after me.

Ran to keep the disk safe.

I was terrified, but my face didn't show it. I put on my poker face, just like you always told me too.

I had one mission; keep the disk safe.

I was tackled to the ground by Solomon. He whispered nothings into my ear, trying to get me to calm down. But I kept lashing. I needed to get further away. You wanted me too run. You wanted me to be safe. Suddenly everything was black, and when I woke up I was in the hospital. The CIA's of course. I knew right from the beginning Solomon must've knocked me out. I got up suddenly and everything went blurry. I heard beeping shoot up. The beats coming in way too quickly.

"Cammie," I heard Solomon tell me. "Cammie, calm down."

Everything was glossy. But I knew that Solomon was telling me to calm down. Not you. Finally my vision cleared and I saw Solomon was the only person in the room. The beats shot higher.

"Cameron," Solomon hissed in a strict voice.

"Where is he?" I asked brokenly.

"Cammie," I heard Solomon whisper. My eyes flashed to his face and I saw the sadness.

I knew you were killed.

I don't know what came over me. But in an instant I was screaming, as if my body was being ripped to shreds. The beats were coming dangerously fast, and more people were running into the room. Shouting and yelling were going on. I knew they were trying to get me in control, but it wasn't going to happen. They took you from me Grant. They _**took**_ you. So much hate was built up in me it was all unleashed then. People were pushing on my body, trying to keep me still, but I wasn't going to have that. My world was turned black again and I knew they gave me a sedative or something.

I hissed as I felt hands on my shoulders. I felt the cold sweat dripping down my face and I heard incoherent words. I couldn't breathe.

"Cam? CAM," I heard Bex frantically demand. Slowly I looked up with a glossy look. "Cam!" she almost shouted. Somehow people weren't looking at us, as if it were normal for a girl to be screaming at her half-sister. As if it were normal that I couldn't breathe.

_Cammie, breathe. Just breathe_.

There was a sharp intake before I let out a breath at your words. Then my glossy look turned to pure hatred. The Circle of Cavan took you Grant, and I wasn't having that. Bex fell back stunned and the hatred I flashed at her. I saw the fear in her eyes.

"Cam?" Jonas asked. My head quickly turned to him and he took a step back. I still felt a hand on my shoulder and I glared at the next person. A look of pure hatred. It was at Corbin, too bad for him.

Quickly I got up and walked away. What were they doing here? Well I guess they must've found me. And during my flashback. The three of them sat by the tree I was just at, probably wondering what the heck just happened. I almost ran to the doors of the cafeteria. I needed to get out of this school. And that stupid court yard wasn't having it for me.

I quickly made my way through the cafeteria to the door. Just as I was about to go through, a boy coming from the opposite way walked into me. I gave him the look I gave Corbin, but this kid didn't even flinch. After about half a second, I decided that I didn't want to wait for him so I shoved him out of the way. As soon as I heard the doors close I sprinted for the main doors. I_ needed_ to get out of this place.

I barreled out the door and ran left, opposite of the city. I wanted to laugh that I still had it, no one had seen me escape, but that wasn't how I acted anymore. I still hadn't ventured the town enough to know where I was going, but as long as it was away from buildings I was fine. I kept running, and you kept flashing through my head. All bloody and pale, telling me to run, to keep the disk safe. Suddenly I couldn't breath again and I fell down onto my shoulder. I did a few summersaults as I clutched my heart.

**Grant** I mentally screamed. Then I heard your soft breathing, as if we were hiding in the laundry chute again. I found my breathe again and got up to start running again. I needed to get away. It took me a second to realize that somehow I was on a dirt road. I stopped, huffing for a moment. Then I turned around and looked for anything familiar.

Nothing.

I sighed as I realized I got carried away again. But you always do that to me Grant.

I decided to keep walking down the gravel road. Slowly, the gravel turned more into grass, and then I was walking on a grass path with long grass flying up around me I looked around as I saw trees and flowers sprouting. Suddenly I saw the path starting to get wider and wider. Then I was standing at the edge of a cliff. I stared as I saw the vegetation grow less and less, then I saw the mountains of snow in the distance. _Appalachian._

I stared out watching the scenery. There was no way this was my life. My life was getting cheesy and worse every moment. A cliff in the middle of Roseville? This would be where the handsome, kind boy would come singing and we would gaze off into the distance and irrevocably fall in love. He would sweep me off my feet and we would live happily ever after.

But this isn't a Disney movie.

Not even close to a fairy tale folks.

"We're not in Roseville anymore."

I kept staring ahead. Well I guess you got the cheesy movie line cliché.

"You're going to get lost on your way back," the boy kept going on. I heard his footsteps come closer.

"Nice spot isn't it?"

I turned my head see the boy I pushed beside me. Huh, definitely not getting the handsome, kind, singing boy either I see. He wasn't breathing hard which interested me. I studied him a little more. He was tall and had broad shoulders. His green eyes definitely popped out against his tan skin. His hair was a little longer than a buzz cut, and it made me wonder if he would have _ever_ possibly went to Blackthrone. He was more toned than a regular junior would be and- wait, what was I thinking?

"Relaxing," he murmured as he closed his eyes and let his head fall back against a tree near to me. I rolled my eyes. "So you're mute," he concluded. Then he opened his eyes again and looked at me. I gave him a mean look then turned around and walked back to where I came from.

"Whoa! Hold up there! You're going to get lost," he told me jogging to catch up to me. I inwardly groaned. This kid wasn't going to keep following me, hopefully. I knew how to get out. Even though I was running in a blur, I still know my surroundings.

It has something to do with being a spy.

He finally fell silent as he walked beside me. As we reached the gravel road, he spoke up again.

"We just skipped school." I glanced at him and gave him a 'we're-being-grouped-together-now,-really?' sort of look. "Well we're both walking back to Roseville aren't we?" the boy asked. I just realized I didn't even know his name.

I didn't want to stick around to find out.

As he went on talking, slowly I started moving to the other side of the road. Since the road wasn't that wide, he didn't notice. He looked ahead again and I made my move. Quickly I disappeared into the thickness of the woods. I made sure that I didn't crawl to far into the forest, but I made sure I was hidden from the boy. As soon as I felt comfortable I started running through the woods. Before I knew it I was out of the woods and back onto a sidewalk. I followed the sidewalk and found myself in town. The total opposite way that I had come from. I stood a minute, confused beyond belief, but decided to walk again. I was pretty sure Rachel was going to have a cow, finding out I had skipped all of my afternoon classes of my first day. So instead of returning to school, I walked through town to the house. Well just say that Rachel was genuinely surprised when I returned home oh...

Three hours early.

I walked to the room Bex and I shared and found a box on the bed. _What the heck?_

I threw the box under the bed as the door opened.

"Honey, why are you home so early?" Rachel asked me. She _looked_ like she cared. Whether she did or not, I have NO idea. Suddenly the doors downstairs slammed open and we both stood there in silence.

"MOM CAM'S MISSING!" Bex literally screamed.

"Honey, she's right here," Rachel replied confusion on her face. I heard footsteps race up the stairs. Bex wasn't alone, not that I thought she would be.

"Cam!" Jonas squeaked when he saw me. I smirked on the inside, laughing at how frightened he was of me. But my face was emotionless.

My poker face has gotten good, Grant.

"Rebecca, what happened?" Rachel asked, knowing she would get more out of Bex than me.

"Dunno, Mom! I was in the lunch room when I saw her looking over the cafeteria, I was gona stand up and wave at her but I knew she wouldn't like that-" _No you wouldn't like that_, I can hear you snicker "then she made way outside. So I got these idiots and we went outside. It took a moment to find her. She was so hard to find. Okay, so maybe it took ten minutes to find her, but anyways! We found her and walked over to the tree. She had a glossy look in her eyes, as if she wasn't really there, and then, then… cold sweat and terrifying glares," Bex trailed off. Nice to know that my glares have that nice of an impact.

Rachel looked at us skeptically, but let us off the hook. I had no idea what she was going to tell the school, but she was going to get us all out of this mess somehow.

"Pain," Corbin said looking directly at me once we had shut the door and gotten situated. I was sitting on the bed, Bex on the floor, Jonas by the computer, and Corbin himself leaning against the wall. I looked at him with confusion while Bex voiced my thoughts.

"What do you mean?" she muttered.

"Cam's in pain." Suddenly Bex and Jonas's eyes were on me too. Did I mention I hate attention? I glared at Corbin as he tried to guess my past.

"From what? Where are you getting this?" Bex asked.

"He's reading her face," Jonas replied. I stared at him. What?

"I'm lost," Bex said. Bex was like my voice box.

"Her eyes, her features… when we got to her by the tree, her face was coiled in pain. He eyes were shut tight- it was as if she were trying to keep herself from bursting," Corbin concluded. I stared at him.

_Grant, he would make a damn good spy._

**PAGE BREAK**

"So Cameron, what do you want to do?" I gave her a look which made her blush right away.

"Right, sorry. You don't talk," Bex replied, more to herself though.

She walked over to the bed and then fell down. I looked over questioningly while Jonas and Corbin laughed at her.

"I stubbed my toe on that freaking _thing_," Bex grounded out. She laid on her stomach and pulled out a box-

MY box.

Quickly I snatched it from her. Confusion ran across her features.

"Cam? What?" I held the box closely to me. I had no idea who it was from, but I knew that it was important. "Cam?" Bex asked softer and softer.

We sat in a few moments of silence.

"Do you want to open it?" Bex asked, realizing that I hadn't opened it yet. I glanced sideways a few times, still not trusting. Slowly I put the box on the bed and everyone crowded around the bed.

"Bet you it's a gift of some kind," Corbin stated.

"Man, you have your blond moments," Bex snapped back. Corbin blushed for a second before recomposing himself.

Slowly I pulled off the top of the box and found red fabric with a note. Before anyone could see I grabbed the note and the fabric. I only grabbed the fabric so it wouldn't look weird grabbing… nothing.

I lifted the fabric between me and the other three. I heard Bex let out a small gasp. "It's beautiful," I heard her whisper. I heard Corbin wolf-whistle and I heard I nice loud smack right after it. I got off the bed and realized that I was holding a dress. _Strapless_ red dress to be more percise. It was beautiful, it was plain, yet it was intoxicating at the same time - it was just a regular plain-red strapless dress. It must've been the fabric that made it look so pretty. Had to be. Suddenly Bex was out the door, running down the stairs. Corbin and Jonas were following hot on her trail. Quickly I dropped the dress to scan the note.

_'You may be needing this soon. Good luck._

_- Joe'_


	4. Chapie 4

"Cameron, I know that it's hard he died, but you have to pull yourself together!"

I sat dazed in the airplane. Solomon was on my left, and my mother was on my right. We were on our way back to the states from the mission Grant and I had just been on. My mother was scolding me, but it was obviously not effecting me in the way she hoped.

"Joe-"

"She'll be fine. She's a strong girl... She's a Morgan."

With those words my mother seemed to be reassured. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw my mother relax slightly. Her shoulders slumped, her leg muscles _untensed_. We were sitting by the window and my mother was nearest to the window.

"Matt." I heard her murmur out. I stared at her, as if I were to get some answers from the brief name my mother had just uttered. I had no such luck. But at that point in my life, I should have never believed in luck. Because in one second, everything can disappear, _go away_, or be **taken** away.

I felt the plane lurch before I heard the screams.

"STAY CALMN! STAY CALMN!" voices and people started frantically trying to keep things under control. I sat silently in my seat, as calm as my mother and Solomon._ 'Maybe now I can be where you are, Grant...'_ Finally the attendants were able to get everyone in their seats. As soon as they had everyone's attention, the quickly showed us emergency procedures. Except this time it was for real. We were going in for a... bumpy landing. I copied the lady standing in front, inflating the flotation device. I put it on and before the woman could say anything else, the plane lurched even more. The lady screamed and Solomon was there in a flash, buckling her in. Then he returned to his seat as if nothing happened. I sat and watched in silence as we plummeted towards the sea.

Now I may not remember what my mother looks like, but I remember being shocked that day. For the first time I saw my mother cry. I saw as the tear drop fell from bottom eyelid, but then trailed up due to the motion of the plane. I saw the water starting to come closer and closer. Then for a split second, I faced fear.

I didn't want to die anymore.

I wanted to stay with my mother and Solomon.

I wanted to carry out our legend, Grant. I wanted to stay the best.

Then I snapped back into reality. I wasn't too scared anymore. I was going to be dealt with whatever hand I was given with. I wouldn't complain with death, and I wouldn't complain with life. But what with really happened, I complained much.

We hit the ocean with much force. I felt as if my body was being shattered into pieces. it was only then when I realized everyone was screaming: everyone was panicking.

Then I felt the water rush up on my body. I felt the fear try to creep up on me again, but I quickly shoved it aside. Quickly I took off my seat belt along with my mother and Solomon, we swam up. I took in the biggest breath I could when we got to an air socket. I knew that I wouldn't be getting another free one like this. Quickly we shred of the floatation devices, knowing it would only limit us.

"Joe, the people down there. We can't save them all-" my mother started, but she never had time to finish. The plane slipped and fell down further into the water, thus bringing us into the cold waters of the sea. I felt my mother's slim hand grab mine, and I saw Solomon already swimming to another air pocket. We resurfaced, getting the air we needed.

"It's a man for himself now," Solomon replied. We waited in silence as they contemplated their next move.

"Let's swim out a window. Because of the force, I'm sure one of the widows were busted open," I suggested.

"Think of where we are, Cameron, we are by the west coast. Great white sharks **love** this area," Solomon shot my idea down.

"So close, yet so far away," I remembered my mother murmur. Then I remember Solomon and my mother locking eyes, vibrant blue eyes with the gorgeous green ones. Next thing I knew I was being dragged down into the water. I stared down to see some person in a wet suit and an air tank on their back.

Circle of Cavan.

I swam down closer, realizing the person was surprised I was complying with him. That was when I nailed him in the face. I saw as his limp body when down, but immediately went down to get him. I know it may have been heartless, but I took the air tank off the man's back and brought it back towards my mother and Solomon who were pointing in a new direction. I remember seeing my mother motion for me to put the air tank on. I obeyed immediately, although I wanted to share it with them. You don't mess with someone with a higher clearance level than you.

Then again I was the one in the three with the higher clearance level.

We made our way to the back of the plane. There was a mess of cups and crayons. I silently prayed for the little kids. I tried shutting my eyes as we passed struggling bodies, some already even drowned. Then again when you're trying to follow someone you have to sort of see where they're going. You can't exactly close your eyes real tight. So I did the next best thing, I kept my eyes on my mother and Solomon, never once taking my sight off of them. Every once in a while they would hang back with me to stop by for air, but for the most part their lung capacity was HUGE. Finally we reached a door and Solomon kicked it down, no problem. We went in and it was all air. There was a door at the far end and I'm pretty sue that's what our goal was. Solomon was the first to jump out of the water, my mother forced me next. I watched her face as I swam by.

All I saw was _love_.

She loved me, more than anything else in the world. She absolutely LOVED me. Her face was full of LOVE.

And that was the last emotion I saw on her face. Solomon grabbed me as my mother pushed me up. Then I felt nothing under my feet. Before I could look back Solomon had grabbed my wrist and we were sprinting towards the door. As soon as he threw open the door, I heard two distinct words coming from the door we had just popped out of, coming from that hated woman that I would have **loved** to kill.

_"Get her."_

_GET HER._

"Cam? Cam? CAMERON!" Startled I shot up. That was definitely not part of- oh. I stared at Mr. Robinson as he watched me with worry. "You alright Morgan?" I stared at him longer. "Right. The one who doesn't speak," he muttered rolling his eyes. I realized I had been reliving my past in the middle of pre. calc. Never a good thing. "Should I even bother asking her for the answer?" he asked. Most people shook their head no. Good thing.

"Noah, tell us the answer."

"Uhhhhhh." With that I heard the class laughter go up. I looked up and paid attention a little bit.

"Can anyone tell me the answer? Or show me the answer?" Mr. Robinson asked. He sounded a little, desperate per say.

_You got that right_, I can hear you say it Grant. Why can't I get you out of my head? I looked up at the board. Huh, he had it all written out.

"Anyone PLEASE?" he asked again. Quietly I got out of my seat. I heard the room hush down as I made my way up to the board. Quickly and efficiently I solved the problem. I turned around silently asking Mr. Robinson to continue on with class. He held his hand out for the chalk when I heard a boy snicker.

"Does she have a body shape?"

"Dude, she's just insecure."

"Then why does she wear baggy clothing?"

"She doesn't look overweight."

"You mean fat? Well she never takes that hood of hers down anytime so we wouldn't know would we?"

Now _normal_ people wouldn't of heard that, but you know, me being a spy… _'Nail him'_ you say.

That's exactly what I did.

I snapped the chalk in half and chucked the two pieces at the two boys. Let's just say after a few stitches, they didn't come near me again. Everyone was amazed at how pieces of chalk could do such damage.

They should see what I can do with cotton…

After my answer was declared CORRECT, and those stupid boys were dragged out of the classroom, along with their blood cleaned up, we continued on with class.

As if nothing happened.

I could actually maybe deal with this school.

**PAGE BREAK**

The bell went off and everyone went racing off, well beside me. Slowly I picked up my stuff and walked to my locker. I was almost knocked over by running kids, MULTIPLE times. I was just that normal I guess. I turned the corner when I saw people at my locker. Immediately I back-stepped and stayed behind the turn. Then I realized it was just Bex.

"Bex, let's just go too lunch," Corbin tried coaxing.

"No, I'm making sure Cam is included. Plus I don't want her being by herself if she's going through… pain," she finished quietly. How sweet, she was worrying about me.

NOT.

I realized, I can't get close to anyone anymore. You can only be hurt. There's no good in trying to get close. Honestly, I was getting pretty close. I was smiling in my head these days. Not okay. You can get close to something, but then when you're pulled away, it only hurts more.

You taught me that Grant.

That whole mission taught me that.

I learned what it felt like, to have my father taken away from me, never again to see his body. I learned what it's like to have your partner killed in front of your eyes. I learned how missions can be life or death, and how they can take people you care about away. I learned what it's like to have my mom taken from me the same day my partner was killed. I learned what it was like to have someone you trust the most turn against you, 'only to do what was right'. I learned the meaning of a double agent.

I learned how you can never escape fear.

I learned how to survive in the Pacific ocean. I learned more about sharks. I learned how to escape death by inches. I learned how to steer a boat. I learned how to break into Ford company and steal a car without anyone noticing. I learned how to drive at age twelve. I learned how to get past cops. I learned how to get food without money. I learned to be heartless. I learned to be a CIA agent. I learned the meaning of a double agent gone bad. I learned of how agents can come back to the CIA. I learned of more than I could hope about the Circle of Cavan.

Yes, that mission taught me so much. And so have the past years. It taught me so much it affected me, so much that they thought it were best to put down the whole spy business.

But then they had to rethink that because of all the information I know.

In the end they let me go, seeing it was the best they could do for me. They promised me I would be safe, but I knew I would _never _be safe. I sighed as I decided I had to face Bex, Corbin, and Jonas, even if I didn't acknowledge them. I walked around the corner, normally, nonchalant.

"Hey Cam!" I looked up from the floor to see Bex's bright smile. A little light lighted up inside of me, but I doused the fire before it could get me riled. I stared blankly at her as I got made my way to my locker. I quickly opened my locker and threw everything in. Then I slammed it shut.

"Cam?" I looked up to see Jonas staring at me. 'What?' I mentally sighed. Before I could do anything, signal, ANYTHING, I heard a voice.

"JONAS!" I spun around along with everyone else to see a pixie running down the halls. I'm not kidding you here! A sun burnt, blond, pixie, was running down the hall toward us. Corbin caught sight of my face and fell down laughing. I won't lie. I showed emotion for once.

COMPLETE, UTTER CONFUSION.

I stared at the frail blond as she stopped in front of us. She couldn't stop in time which meant she grabbed the closest thing. Which just happened to be an unstable stack of newspapers. She went sprawling along with the newspapers.

"Oppsie daisy!" she cutely said in a southern accent. I was still staring down at the skinny girl in front of me.

"Hey Maggie McBrayer," Bex said in a teasing tone. Huh, must be some joke.

"H-hey Liz," I heard Jonas stutter. I turned to him and saw him all red. Aw, young love.

Whatever, not my thing.

"Hey guys!" she cheerfully said as she pulled herself up."Liz Sutton!" she cheerfully told me. "Nice to meet you!" she gave me a big pearly white smile. I grimaced slightly at her 'happiness'.

"This is Cam," Bex told Liz. "Don't bother starting a conversation with her, she doesn't talk much."

"At all," Jonas coughed. Bex glared at him while Liz interpreted the invisible chat going on.

"I'm hungry, let's get to lunch," Corbin spit out. Suddenly everyone was making their way to the lunch room, leaving me behind. I knew that they didn't really care for me. Bex was only doing this because she was my sister. I watched their backs as they turned the corner. I sighed as I bent down to pick up the newspapers scattered across the floor. I held down a groan as I saw the pages had fallen out of the newspaper. Great, just what I needed. Scattered newspaper papers. I started picking up papers in any order. I was going to have to fix this anyways.

"Whoa!" I turned my head to see Nikes almost in front of my face. I looked up to glare at whoever had almost just kicked me. "Didn't see you there," the kid from yesterday said in a teasing voice. I turned back to the task at hand before I rolled my eyes. _No one sees you_.

Thanks Grant.

Suddenly the boy was down beside me helping me pick up the newspapers. I sat more upright, sitting on the heel of my foot while my other leg just stuck out. "Something tells me you didn't make this mess," mystery kid told me. I rolled my eyes (again) and finished picking up the newspapers. Then I walked over to the nearby cove and laid the papers on the table.

"Want help?" mystery kid asked me. I gave him a 'what-do-you-think?' look. But otherwise interpreted as a big NO. The kid being who he was though ignored me. He popped a squat right next to the chair I was going to sit in. I sighed as I walked around to the other side of the table before taking a seat. "What? I don't bite!" mystery kid smirked from across the table. I stared at him with a blank expression. That seemed to have an effect on him. It was funny, really, watching the smirk slowly fade from his face. Finally when his mouth was closed I looked down towards the newspapers. Some of the newspapers were intact and I grabbed them. I waved them in front of his face to make sure he was watching. Then I put them on the other table.

There were only two circle tables in the minicove. There were two brick walls of the school, then obviously the entrance to the hall way, although there were thick felt curtains to block the cove when necessary. Then to my back, the whole wall was made of glass. I looked back for a moment, seeing the light traces of snow falling down. It had already been three months since I had been here. I hadn't met anyone new.

I knew Bex, Corbin, and Jonas. I met them at the house when I came over the first time. We had established all we needed to. Then I had met Tina, the little motor mouth who loved me because I sort of listened to her. I obviously know Rachel, she's my foster mom. I had just met Liz, most likely Jonas's little girlfriend from their expressions. And finally this little kid in front of me, mystery boy. That is a total of seven people. A total of seven people who have sat with me, or have tried to talk to me, or anything. In three months of being 'the new girl'.

That's probably a record if you ask me.

I snapped out of my little thought bubble to start rearranging the papers. I'd only been at it for three minutes thirteen seconds when I heard his voice. "You're super cute when you focus." I looked up in disbelief. Was he really hitting on me? He smirked at my expression. "No, I mean it. You get this little wrinkly thing right here," he concluded, making a show by bringing his thumb and pointer finger in between his eyebrows.

I was stunned for a minute. Or two. I can't deny that fact. Then I realized I had another expression on my face in the last ten minutes. Not good. My mask was slipping. I needed to get away. I couldn't stand it anymore. I jumped up and ran out of the room. Grant, what do I do?

I'm a mess without you.

I swore I wouldn't show emotion, ever since that day in the hospital room. I was so good about it. And then I came here, and suddenly it all started slipping through my fingers. No one notices, Grant. But I do. YOU would. I hadn't shown emotion unless it was inside my head, but here I was, in the past ten minutes, shown confusion, shock - I was stunned.

I AM A SPY.

Grant, I need to hear your voice.

I was outside when I noticed. I was outside in my extra large hoodie, wandering around almost aimlessly in the front lawn. It wouldn't be considered skipping as long as I didn't cross the sidewalk in front of me. I walked over to an old tree. The trunk was huge and I decided that it was time for me to climb it. Quickly I scrambled up so that no one would see.

And then I my emotions showed.

What is going on? I am sixteen years old now. A junior in high school. This happened when we were _twelve_. In _sixth_ grade. I guess some things don't disappear. They don't… go away.

I don't know, Grant. I can't handle it anymore. I need to be alone. Being around people- it's not good for me. Not good at all. It frustrated me and confused me and made me feel. I felt a tear slide down my cheek but it made me remember.

Remember? I swore that I would stay at the top of the list. I promised that I would live out our legend.

Was I living it now?

Was crying going to help me?

I shuddered in disgust at myself. Why was I being decoded like the Rosetta stone? Was it remembering everything so vividly today? Was it that mystery boy? Then it hit me, Grant. The CIA hadn't contacted me in three months. In those three months I had gone crazy, but been happy.

They need to contact me.

Then I realized another thing, Grant. Solomon sent me a dress. A _freaking_ dress. What's up with that? It's has to mean something right? I heard the bell signaling lunch was over go off, and I quickly (but efficiently) got down the tree and walked inside. I didn't want to be seen.

And I wasn't for the rest of the day.

**PAGE BREAK**

As soon as the car stopped I was out of the doors and in the house in an instant. The whole car ride had been awkwardly silent. I quickly ran up to the room and changed out of the jeans I was wearing and slipped on some sweats. Then I climbed up to my bunk and laid down. I decided that I could think more collectively once I had slept. So that's exactly what I did.

_"Cammie, wake up." I groggily sat up as I saw you leaning over me._

_"What's up?" I questioned. It was the day before one of our missions. Maybe you were nervous, but you were hardly ever nervous…_

_"I want you to know, that- okay you're going to think I'm totally weird," he dismissed the conversation._

_"Grant, come on," I whined like the little ten-year-olds we were._

_"If you insist," you said quickly giving in. "I know this sounds really weird, but it's true. I have this feeling-"_

_"I gotta feeling-"  
_

_"NO! Seriously! Like I know when you're in trouble. I can like… sense it or something. It's super weird. Like now, I know you're safe-"_

_"I'm right next to you-"_

_"NOT my point. Like, if anything ever, __**happens**__, I'll know if it's good or bad. Like, I'll know what's going on. I'll know if, something went wrong." I stared at you. I wasn't sure whether to believe you or not, but I knew what you were getting at. You had almost another sense, as if you knew that I was in trouble, or I was happy._

_"No, I get what you're saying," I quietly replied. "I get it too."_

I bolted upright. Yeah, up right into the ceiling. I held in multiple swear words begging to leak out.

"Cam?" Bex asked surprised. I looked down to see Bex, Corbin, and Jonas staring at me. Suddenly a blush crept on Corbin and Jonas' faces. I would've asked if I weren't mute.

Nah, just kidding.

I had a mission. I jumped off the top bunk onto Bex's to which she let out a shrill noise, muffled by her lips. She wasn't opening her lips for some reason. I would ask later. I quickly ran down the stairs. It didn't take long for the three to come scrambling out after me. I knew what I had to do. I had to break into the CIA.

…

Okay maybe not, but I had to lug myself over there somehow, and get answers.

AND THAT was when I started to rethink things. I was at the front door already, slipping on my second shoe.

"What are you doing?" Bex demanded. I was too deep in thought to reply. I was standing on one foot before I leaned up against the wall, my hand flying to my chin. Ah damn! I need to stop that stereotypical crap. I put my hand down put them my arms crossed over my chest. Ah well, it's better than the chin thing. But one thing I was pretty sure of.

Grant Newman was not dead.

And I was going to find him.


	5. Chapie 5

I sighed as I decided it was best _not_ to try and break into the CIA. I hadn't been in the field for a while, I didn't know any of the new updates, and let's face it - it would look really suspicious for me to go waltzing in. So it wasn't the best idea I had ever had, but then again right now that was the only idea I had. _Got anything, Grant?_

"Where are you going," Bex demanded. I realized that I must've looked weird, bolting up from sleeping, jumping off the bed, racing down to the door to shoving my shoes on. I wasn't even wearing a coat. They must think I want to leave or something. Slowly I took off my shoes, processing my options. I didn't have many.

My internal clock told me it was seven fifty-four and thirty-one seconds. I glanced at the clock and saw I was dead on. I took off my shoes and walked into the kitchen, wondering what we were having for dinner. Rachel wasn't the best cook around, but she could cook up a mean batch of burnt cookies.

Just saying...

I sat down in one of the chairs, and then in came three VERY confused looking kiddies. I wanted to tell them they looked funny, but I wasn't really in the mood. Plus I hadn't uttered a sound since we came here.

"Hey guys," Rachel greeted us walking into the kitchen. She stopped for a second when she looked at me but then continued on after a minute twenty-four seconds. "I'm going to make some macaroni-"

"Mom, we've established that you cannot accomplish making macaroni and cheese."

"Uh, well how about tacos?"

"Last time?"

"Pizza?"

"Oven was on fire."

"How about noodles?"

"Mom-"

"What _can_ I make then?"

"Uh, pretty much nothing."

We sat in silence for a while Rachel and Bex had some sort of non-verbal battle. After a while Rachel sighed and asked, "Where do you kids want to go?"

Corbin and Jonas grinned at each other while Bex had a victorious smirk on her face. I just watched them all sitting at the table. Why are they so mean to her? I sighed before going to the fridge. _'Lean pockets, frozen pizza, frozen popcorn shrimp, lunchables (who eats those anymore?), a sandwich from a gas station'_

...

_'She's even worse than me, Grant.'_

I closed the doors before seeing anything else. After a while I grabbed some tacos, and set it on the counter. "Cam wants tacos," Jonas brilliantly stated. I even clapped for him.

"Who's going to make it?" Bex asked. I pointed at Rachel.

"Uh, well thank you, honey… I guess," Rachel said a little confused but happy all the same.

"Mom, it's only because she hasn't tasted your food yet," Bex shot her down. I just waved Bex off. Bex huffed but took a seat next to Corbin and Jonas at the counter.

I looked on the box. How hard could this be? So you cook the meat, add the mix and you're done!

Right?

"Sweetheart? I don't think this is-" I scrambled to get near the pot where Rachel was cooking the meat. How can you mess something so simple up? Rachel's got a way.

Quickly I mixed the meat up so that it didn't burn all the way. I took it off the burner and kept mixing it, trying to reduce the heat. After a while I was able to put it back on the stove to let it cool and get everything else ready. Cheese, lettuce, tomatoes- everything was laid out and ready to go.

"Thanks to Cam we might have a semi-good dinner," Bex muttered getting up to get some food. I gave her a glare. Aren't kids nicer to their parents? After everyone got their food and sat down we ate.

And it tasted _good_.

I ate my meal in silence while everyone else enjoyed their tacos. Your _welcome_, guys. _'I wish I could give you some Grant, I think my cooking is okay now.'_ I remembered when I tried to make a chocolate cake for Grant for his birthday.

. . .

Yeahhhh, didn't end so well.

After dinner Rachel went to her study while the three ran back to Bex's room, dragging me behind. At least they remembered me this time. I wondered why we never went to Jonas or Corbin's house, but I didn't really care to ponder for long. Bex's house was pretty big, so that's probably why we always hung out here. Once it was ten o'clock, Rachel made Corbin and Jonas run home and made Bex and me go to bed. I quickly slipped under the covers and tried to get warm. It was cold during the winter and I was constantly getting shivers up my spine.

I heard a little bit of whispers outside of the door as Rachel and Bex walked up the stairs.

"-hood was down, did you see?" I heard Bex whisper, barely audible.

"Yeah, I was a little taken back. She looked so different, so pretty," Rachel replied. It made me curious wondering who they were talking about.

"It made Corbin blush. I mean, I understand Jonas because he's like that, but _Corbin_-"

"I understand sweetie, but let's save this for later. Just get some rest now," I heard Rachel right outside the door. Then the door opened and Bex walked into the darkness.

"Cam?"

Silence.

"Right, you don't talk. Damn, I should remember that by now," I heard her mumble to herself.

"Night, Cam."

Silence.

"I hope you feel at home. I love you, sis," I heard her whisper, almost quieter than the night. But I heard it.

**PAGE BREAK**

"Is it okay to tell your coach to fuck off?" Bex came storming in, slamming the door and the cold behind her. I looked up from my homework in the living room. I was the only one home so far and Bex looked **pissed**. _Cammie, she __**is**__ pissed. Probably a little more-_

I shook my head to answer her question when her angry eyes landed on me.

"Is it okay to tell your _team_ to fuck off then?" Bex requisitioned. I shook my head even more quickly. "Damn this!" she grumbled before sliding her backpack off next to me. It clicked in my head that she was starting her winter sport this week… or it was something like that. No, it was a game! But wait, they've already had their first game-

"I hate this!" Bex told me. I just sat their with my ears open staring intently at her. "Our team- UGH! It makes me MAD!" I sighed as I let her take her anger out on me. Not in a literal sense, but I let her rant, not once interrupting her (wow, that's a shocker).

So to put her in a better mood, I stood up and kicked her in the shin.

"OW!" she howled, giving me a glare. "You are so getting it now," she ground out diving for me. We were sort of skirting around each other throwing some jabs that ultimately missed. Then shit got real.

We had been going at it for a solid twenty minutes before Rachel got home just to see Bex wail one right at my stomach, but I side stepped so she nailed a vase right behind me. "Shit," Bex muttered but she kept her eyes fixed on me. She never lost sight of her target. She kicked me in the thigh to which I fell but pounced on her to bring her down with me. We tumbled a couple times as I got a right hook into Bex's ribs. She tried to retaliate before Rachel yelled.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU TWO THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Rachel demanded practically screaming. That's when I REALLY looked around. _It's a mess,_ you chime in. A chair had been over turned and everything was a mess. I won't elaborate with details.

"Uh, letting some steam off?" Bex replied hesitantly climbing off me. We both righted ourselves and sat on the ground. I gave her a questioning look with two thumbs up to which she nodded. Yeah she felt better and yeah it worked.

"Oh no, you two, what were you DOING? It looked as if you were fighting!"

I wanted to insert a 'A DURRR'.

"Yeah, she was letting me release anger," Bex awkwardly stated.

"In my LIVING ROOM?" Rachel screeched.

"Mom, chill out. We'll fix it up," Bex told her.

"Rebecca Baxter! That vase you just _kicked over_ was a vase I stole from the emperor in nineteen eighty six of China! You think you can just FIX it like THAT?" Rachel was yelling on. But I puzzled.

Emperor?

Stole?

China?

Nineteen eighty-six?

"- YOU FIX THIS ROOM UP RIGHT NOW!" I tuned back in for the last part. Bex gave me a look but went to cleaning. What a lovely way to finish a fight.

But that didn't bother me.

The fact that Rebecca Baxter could throw a mean punch and Rachel was talking about stealing a nineteen eighty-six vase from the emperor of China bothered me more.

There was some secret that I was not being told about.

**PAGE BREAK**

I sighed walking out of history. That was by far the worst subject in the WORLD. I hated the class with a passion, and that's saying something. I went to the bathroom and by the time I came out the halls were cleared. I walked down to my locker, in the huge hallway, by myself. When I turned the corner to my locker I saw someone at my locker.

'Not again' I mumbled inside my head. But as I got closer I saw that it was mystery boy. I groaned internally. Why was he here? He looked up and did a double take. What was up with people these days?

"Uh, hey," he awkwardly called out as I approached my locker. He was on my locker. I motioned him to move. He just looked straight in my eyes.

"I'm sorry if I offended you in any way saying you looked cute. By the way my name is Zach." I stared at the boy for a while. He was apologizing for calling me cute? What the heck? I stared longer before I shoved him off of my locker. He took a few steps to the side surprised, but righted himself before I felt his eyes bore into the side of my head. I felt a small blush on my cheeks and I used my hair so that he couldn't see my face. Why did he make me feel… embarrassed? I hated it. Last time I let someone in, I was hurt. My family was killed. One of my best friends turned out to be a double agent. Everyone was against me. I felt someone's hand push my hair behind my ear and I flinched. Majorly. Like I flinched so bad I fell to the ground.

That's when I realized I wasn't wearing a hood.

My eyes widened in shock, as I grabbed for my hood. I threw it over my head and got up and ran.

Ran as fast as I could.

Ran as far as I could.

I knew what Bex was talking about now. I knew what Rachel was talking about.

They could see my face. If I had slipped, they would have seen it. They saw what wasn't hidden.

I didn't like that.

I found myself standing up against the wall, trying not to be heard from my heaving puffing. I had ran all over the school, weaving in and out of classrooms and bathrooms, going through the lunch room only to leave five minutes later. I slid down the wall and sat by **myself**.

The way it should have always been. _Cammie. It's time to move on. To speak again. To make new friends._ I sat in silence, not replying to Grant. I didn't like his words.

They hurt.

Then I went hyper alert as I heard someone slid down next to me. I didn't need to glance to know that it was Zach that slid down next to me.

"Okay, look. I know that you don't talk. I know that you don't like compliments. I know you don't like being called cute. I know you don't like me very much. I know you don't like your hood down. I know that you don't show emotion. Is there anything else I should know so you won't run away?"

I stayed silent and Zach sighed.

"Are we friends?" A moment later he asked, "Can we be friends?"

I cringed. NO! I wanted to shout. NO AND WE WILL NEVER BE!

"I'll take that as a no."

I frowned and turned the other way. We were in the shadow of the school and it was cold, snowing, and I was miserable. I was wearing jeans with a sweatshirt, and here I was kneeling in the snow skipping lunch. Again. This cannot be good for your body.

Before I knew it I felt something go on top of my head and it covered my shoulders. Then I heard the crunch of snow slowly fade away. I looked to make sure Zach had left before seeing what he had handed me. It was his jacket.

He just gave me his jacket.

I almost threw the jacket away, but then I thought better. I put it on and stayed outside longer. Why was that kid going out of his way to try and become friends with me?

WHY was I thinking about him so much?

I felt a small blush rise on my cheeks. _Maybe you like him? Maybe he's nice and you two could be __**friends**__? Ever heard of the word?_ I silently fell on my butt as Grant told me off.

HE WANTED ME TO BE FRIENDS WITH A BOY?

How desperate was that? How weird was that to be having that conversation in my head?

_Cammie, I just want you to be social. I want you to be how you used to be. With me. With a smiling face._ I rolled my eyes.

NOTHING would ever be the same without Grant. After the bell went off I got up and went inside. I didn't want to be seen (when did I want to be seen?) and I no one ever saw me.

**PAGE BREAK**

I walked in science class and sat down. Last class until study hall. I sat down where I usually sat. I sprawled all of my stuff on the table so that everyone would get the clue that no one was going to sit by me. Or so I _thought_ people would get a clue.

"Hey, you look pretty lonely. How bout I sit by you." It was more of a statement than a question. I looked up to glare at Zach as he stacked my books and put them in front of me. "Oh lighten up," he muttered. I hated him and I wanted to kill him so he would stop bugging me, but the other part of me was impressed by how much he was trying._ 'He must have some sort of motive.'_

"Do you like chemistry? Give me a nod for yes, a shake for no." I gave him the do-you-really-think-I'm-going-to-answer-to-you look. He smiled. "Can't you talk? Or are you scared? Do you dislike talking?" I stared at him, putting on my poker face. It was best to stay away from him. I had no idea what he was doing. I was reacting to him. Usually I can just put off people, but he… he just kept coming at me. I silently panicked in my head, but kept my face expressionless.

But it was a struggle. The whole class he was trying to get my attention - whether making faces at me or nudging my knee, sometimes he would get caught and get scolded by the teacher. I didn't know why he was doing it, but after a while I had enough and I snatched a piece of paper from him. Why waste mine? I grabbed his pen too as he watched me amused.

'Can you stop bothering me? Why do you keep trying to distract me?' I slid it over to his side hiding the note behind the stack of books on our desk.

'YOU TALK!' I looked over to see Zach smirking. But he was obviously pleased. I held the note, wiping the smirk off his face. Quickly he wrote something on another note.

'I'm sorry! So, Cammie Morgan, what's it like being mute?' I gave him a glare before I wrote down my reply

'FUCK OFF' I looked up at the board to see Mrs. Bari glancing at me. She saw I was paying attention and smiled at me while I stared blankly back. I heard Zach's deep chuckle as soon as Mrs. Bari looked away. I found myself wondering what his laugh sounded like but immediately stopped.

How was this kid getting through?

I looked down at the touch of something, realizing it was the note. 'Can you **write** why you're mute?'

'No' and just like that I ended the conversation. I know he just wanted to know, but no one knew. I wouldn't tell anyone. Unless you worked for the CIA, and you were on the mission or had something to do with that mission, you didn't know. The bell rung and I sped out of the class to study hall.

Sadly the damage had been done though.

Zach was slowly seeping his way through my barrier.


	6. Chapie 6

**IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I HAVEN'T UPDATED ANYTHING…**

**I'm really sorry for not updating sooner. Two of my aunts got breast cancer, my uncle died, then my close friends died, and then our lunch lady died, and then a girl that my a bunch of my school knew died because she got burnt with a curling iron? I dunno. It's been a sad month. My laptop crashed this weekend so I lost some of my writings, like normal life reloaded so I don't know when that'll be updated. I was injured in sports and am on crutches. Also my hands cut so I'm writing this with like one and a half hands. Then my elbow is hurt so it hurts every time I type. Sports haven't been going well and everyone on the team is depending on the D… which is my group. Just not a good season and it's very frustrating with tons of injuries. I've been bombarded with homework and I really should be writing a term paper but you guys have waited long enough. Sorry if it's not my best I don't reread these… and sorry about the rant. Just needed to get it out.**

**THIS IS DEDICATED TO PETER. I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU. 10/31.**

**THIS IS DEDICATED FOR NICK, NATE, NOAH, AND LUKE BUCKLIN. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN OUR HEARTS. 11/1.**

**PAGE BREAK**

"Hey, Cam!"

I walked right past Corbin out of class. I wanted to be free.

NO ONE got past my barrier.

"Cam. Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaam. CAM! Wait up!"

I did not, in fact, 'wait up'.

"Whoa, someone's in a hurry," Corbin playfully smirked as he fell in stride with me. I just stared ahead. I wasn't going to make any connections. It would only make it worse. I couldn't _afford_ to let people seep in. "Slow down," Corbin commanded as he grabbed my arm. I pulled my arm back and continued walking. I knew he was mad when he grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. If I weren't imposing to be a normal girl, let's just say things would have been ugly.

I gave him one of my darkest glares and even he flinched back slightly but still had a hold onto my arm now so I couldn't escape. 1-0.

"What's got you trucking?" he asked me as I regained control of my arm and walked away from him. He hustled to keep up. "Are you mad at me? Because I did nothing I can recall of," he told me. I sighed. Couldn't he just understand I didn't want to be tampered with? It seemed very obvious to me.

"Well I guess this is my stop-"

I was already long gone before I heard the ending of his sentence. I wove in between people and strode towards study hall. I was tired of people trying to communicate with me. Why couldn't they pick up a clue? You didn't have to be a spy to realize that I was not in the mood of being with someone. You didn't have to be a genius to realize that I didn't want to talk.

I walked into the library instead of study hall. Why do schools call it study hall if they allow little children to talk and not work? It defeats the purpose of _study_. The library was much quieter, and considering it was during school no one was in there. I walked to the very back and settled in. I concentrated on studying instead of everything else that was forming in my head. I needed to let all my thoughts calm down and focus on other things.

School work it is.

The rest of the period flowed by fairly quickly, much accomplished by me. I knew most of this stuff, all I had to do was fill the worksheets out.

I walked out of the library back to my locker. I was going to walk home today, no matter what they thought. I got to my locker and quickly grabbed everything needed. Before I closed my locker I heard the intercom turn on.

"Cameron Morgan, please report to the office. Cameron Morgan."

That just ruined my chance.

Sighing I walked to the office. Again on the opposite side of the school. This school did not think about planning very well. They didn't have a connecting building from the fourth and first building so you had to walk all the way around, the office was on the first floor of the third building.

My locker was on the third floor of the first building.

Finally I made it to the office. A nice looking lady was there I'll admit, she was pretty. She was happy and it wasn't fake. She had blonde hair to her shoulders and a slender body. "Are you Cameron?" she asked me nicely. She had a high pitched sweet voice. I nodded. "Okay, you're needed in room 3142. Have a nice day!" she gave me a smiled and then helped the person next to me. I only then realized that there was a line behind me. _Come on Cam, keep up the job_ I hear him mock me.

I walked out and down the hall to 3142. As I walked in I realized there was no one there. Confused I walked in further and looked around. I heard the door click. I strained my ears to hear another person breathing. I turned around only to see a note hanging onto the door by a ribbon. Then I heard wind and quickly looked the other way. The window was open, and everything in the room went still. No breathing. I walked over the door and looked at the piece of paper.

'_D__**o**_n'_t_ Ge**t** INVOLVED'

I looked at it. What could that mean. Involved. Why was that normal letters. Suddenly the door opened and a boy stood out there. I awkwardly looked back at him.

"W-wh-what are you doing in here?" he stammered.

I walked out.

Something screwy was going on. I walked outside and down the sidewalk staring as I stepped over crack after crack. When I looked up I noticed a black van on the property. Property? It was gone before I could even process what it could be. In fact I didn't think at all on my walk home. Instead I just let my mind go white like the white snow. I tried not to think of anything. I just zoned myself out and started walking through the cold. I felt the bitter wind as it whipped at my face while I walked into the wind. Suddenly I was realizing that it was cold, and ten blocks felt like a long way. Suddenly a car pulled into the drive way dead ahead of me and I stopped. The dark windows of the red sports car was making me suspicious when the car stopped exactly so that the passenger side door was a little ahead of me. Then the door opened.

"Want a lift?"

I glared back as that cocky little mysterious boy smirked at me while offering me a ride.

I'd rather walk. I started walking towards it but walked around the front end and back to the side walk. Before I got any further I had a hand on my wrist and was being held back. Softly. My eyes involuntarily widened to no one as I was surprised at the kindness and gentleness of the action. I composed myself and turn around.

"Please? It might only be a block but you have to be cold. You're nose is red," he stated trying to coax me into his car. I could tell he was being sincere, but I didn't want the feeling that I was the damsel in distress.

Cause I was definitely not.

I decided to continue walking deciding that it would hurt something I called dignity if I went with him. Plus I was going to do what I set out to do. I wanted to walk home, I was gona carry all the way through with it.

"Nope. I knew it was going to come to this." I didn't turn around which was fatally my mistake. Didn't they tell us in training to never look back?

I mean how do you defend yourself when you get a bag thrown over your whole body?

I was put into the car and I heard a click. Child lock.

He then got into the car and drove away. "I bet anyone who saw that would think I was a kidnapper," he sighed. Then he came to a stop 2 left turns and one right turn later. He then untied the bag so that I could get out of it. I threw it off and glared at him. He smiled at me but I was so mad I kept my glare. He then stepped on the gas and I was thrown into my seat. I quickly put my seatbelt and looked at the speedometer.

_87_.

I looked at the road signs we were flying by. 20 mph limit. No big deal. No question about it we were not going to MY house.

"So am I gona have to talk the whole time?" he asked me not once looking at me. _Good cause you should smack him for flying and not keeping his eyes on the road_. I rolled my eyes at Grant's comment and then reached for the power button of the radio. "Oh yeah." That was mystery kid's brilliant reply. "If you're wondering why I'm going so fast it's cause I know the streets," he told me as he made a sharp turn causing the car to fishtail. I held onto the car for dear life. "And if you're wondering where we're _going_, you'll just have to wait and see," he replied smiling. I wasn't sure if I liked it or not.

**PAGE BREAK**

I fell asleep. Yes I know, what kind of top agent falls asleep? Well when you're cold and you get warm air and you just get sleepy. Don't deny it, I know you've done it too. I remember when you did it when we were with Solomon and - I looked half-lidded to see Zach reaching over to my side. I was about to grab his hand when I heard the seatbelt buckle click. Slowly and gently he removed the seatbelt from my body. I closed my eyes as he looked toward my face. I felt him slowly wrap his arm around my back and his other around my legs.

I wanted to tense so badly as he carried me out of the car and into the cold. I had no idea what he was going to do, and I had no idea who this kid was, and this could end_very badly_. Then he shifted me into one arm. In my head I was impressed. He held me like a child. _Grant, this isn't normal. I don't recall ever a sophomore being able to carry another sophomore like a child._

He shut the door and then grabbed something off the roof. So he was just going to carry me one armed. Slowly I came to cause a) I didn't want to be continued to be carried, and b) I was going to walk myself. As I slowly opened my eyes I realized my head had slumped into the crook of his neck. I slowly righted myself and he slowly stopped and looked at me. _Yeah Grant I'm finally picking up on the 'don't assume' thing_. I turned my head towards him and gave him a look that told him to drop me. He stared back then handed me his coffee cup. Assuming he was going to drop me I took it. Instead he swung me to two arms. I left out a surprised gasp feeling air as he threw me into the open air only to catch me with two.

I glared at him as he smirked at me. I drank out of his coffee cup and watched his smirk wash off his face. It was hot chocolate and it was still hot. I looked the other way only to see woods.

I didn't like how I was being carried. I never liked being carried period. I surprised him when I straightened my body and then jumped off his arm and started walking straight.

"Cammie, you don't know where you're going," Zach said. I stopped and turned around to face him. "It's this way," he grinned pointing to his left, my right. I rolled my eyes and walked in front of him. "Cam, you're gona get lost," I could hear the laughter in his voice. I felt his hand grab mine and we were turning right. After the turn and a couple minutes he was still holding my hand. _This would've been the time you smacked him, Grant, for not knowing when to stop_. I stopped and he looked back at me. I put our intertwined hands in the air and waved it around, hoping he would get a clue to drop my hand. "Alright, if I hold on to your hand, you can lead with your 'leaderly-instincts' and I can make sure you don't get lost on the way. Good plan right?" I stared at him. Was he an idiot? "Good plan yes let's go," he didn't even bother looking for my reaction. Jerk.

I slowly trudged after him, much to his annoyance. He threatened to carry me a couple times, but I gave him the 'I'd-like-to-see-you-try-and-even-get-your-arm-around-me' look. Finally we reached a cliff and he let go of my hand. _You've got to be kidding me. Another cliff? What the hell is up with-_

"Ready?"

I looked back at Zach. I gave him a questioning glance. "I'll give you two options," he started out, "we can climb down the mountain side or we can do it my way. What's it going to be?" I stared at him waiting for him to elaborate 'my way' but he seemed pretty set not telling me. I sighed and walked over to the edge of the cliff. That was a long way down, not something I would want to do.

I looked back over at him. "My way? Sweet." He walked over and pulled me to him. I gasped at the closeness and before I could do anything I was somehow being strapped to him. What the hell was he doing? What was going on? I tensed as he kept going. _Calm down, Cammie. It's gona be okay._ Slowly I relaxed and let Zach do whatever. For some reason Grant was nice about Zach. "Hold on tight."

_Hold on tight? What is this?_

I learned very quickly what he meant. Suddenly I was tipping over backwards into air. I felt the wind rushing on my back and I held on to Zach's sweatshirt. I heard him chuckle as we zipped into the forest and further than I ever imagined wanting to go.

I closed my eyes shut, trying to get used to the feeling I had forgotten about so long ago. I heard the whipping noises of the cords and the feeling of not touching the ground. I heard Zach carelessly laugh as I relived my past.

With you.

When went hang gliding, flew through hand gliding- Grant, I missed.

I missed you so much.

Air was barely passing through my lungs, my breath coming in labored pants. I heard Zach shouting but the words made no sense.

Grant you shouldn't of died. It was my fault. I couldn't move quick enough. I didn't think quick enough. I wasn't there to get your back.

Grant, I'm so so sorry.

I hit the ground and the little breath that I had was knocked out of me. I feel lifeless. Without you what did I have? Nothing.

I'm sorry, Grant.


	7. Chapie 7

"CAMERON! CAMERON!" I could hear a blurred version of my name. It wasn't fully coming through. Was I suffocating? It didn't really matter.

I was the one who let you die. I deserve it.

Suddenly I felt hands on my chest and pressure being applied. It hurt but it also forced me to suck in a huge breathe. I gagged as I gasped for air. I hated Zach at the moment. Maybe I wanted to die. Maybe I couldn't live with the fact that I was living and Grant wasn't.

"What the hell! Are you about to die on me?! For fuck's sake, if you were scared to do it or something just should've moved-" Zach went on yelling at me. I silently took it of course.

My eyes were glazed over. I couldn't focus on his face. His voice started to blur. I didn't care. Maybe I was losing consciousness. Maybe, just maybe, something else was going on?

My thoughts were scrambled as everything went to being far distant, like they were moments ago. It was as if I were zeroing out on my life, my body and soul detaching from each other.

Suddenly I was rushed back as my body was pulled into a tight embrace. It took me a moment to process what was going on. It was then I realized that Zach was hugging me. Just holding me. Slowly my breath returned to me, my breathing ragged.

"I'm sorry I made you do something you wouldn't want to do. I didn't think you would react this way." I heard Zach. I felt Zach. I saw Zach. Heck I was even becoming accustomed to his smell.

But it didn't feel like I was present on this earth.

It truly was an out of body experience. My mind was numb. _'Your name is my mantra, Grant.' _I stared blankly up into the sky. I then saw the line, springs, and everything else associated with zip lining. _'Huh.'_ I was pulled back with a sharp intake when I was being squished from the tightness of this kid's hug. It was as if this boy was holding onto me for dear life, his head on my shoulder as if he was the one who needed the comforting.

_Grant, it's me who needs the comforting. I need you._

I felt Zach pull back to look at me once my breathing was normal. "Cammie?"

I didn't even notice that I was crying. "Cammie," Zach whispered before pressing me into his shoulder. I know, be shocked I let him.

Be even more shocked that I stayed there.

I silently cried in his embrace as I thought. It was the first time since your death I let an emotion show. I cried for you. I cried properly in full remorse. I miss you, Grant. Why'd they take you from me? I wasn't scared. If they came for me I didn't care. I just wanted you back. My partner, my lifelong buddy. The kid who was with me since day one, who went through as much pain as torture as I did.

I cried as Zach held me close to him trying to calm me. I knew he would never be able to fully calm me, to heal what didn't break because of him. He was comforting me for all the wrong reasons.

My tears stopped running after a while and in turn became shudders and sharp intakes.

"I'm sorry, Cammie," he whispered over and over, whether to himself or me I didn't know. I wanted to yell at him; to scream at him to shut up. To tell him he knew nothing, and he should leave my life. I wanted to tell him he was comforting me for the wrong reason, and I was mourning over you. Grant, I don't know how much longer I can do this.

"Cammie-" I pried myself away from him. I couldn't listen to him say my name one more time. I couldn't stand him saying sorry one more time. "Are you mad? God, I'm so," he sighed out of frustration. I walked away and looked around. For miles and miles I could only see snow covered trees.

I jumped when I felt the coat being pulled in front of me. "It helps when you actually zip the coat up," Zach mumbled as he zipped up his coat. I was surprised that I was still wearing his jacket. He put his hands on my shoulders staring at me. I stared back.

After a while it got old, and I raised an eyebrow questioning him silently.

"Can we share a moment for more than a minute? Is that possible for you?" he ran a hand through his hair annoyed. Did the fool think we just shared a moment?

But to answer his question, no, we could not. I was a spy somehow going to break into the CIA and he was a normal kid. Wait, normal kid? Why would a normal kid go zip lining off a cliff. Why would a kid HAVE materials for that in the first place? Suddenly I got suspicious of him.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" he questioned looking at me strangely. Oh, because you know, you're such a normal kid who randomly kidnaps a girl drags her out into the middle of the woods, finds a cliffs then goes zip lining.

I looked up to see how far down we were but I couldn't even see the top of the cliff. Huh, I guess the trees were pretty thick. I looked up to see the wire, debating whether I would be able to see it once I broke out of the wooded area. The sky was a beautiful grey which would most likely make it impossible to see.

"You're never going to get out without my help, I hope you now," Zach trailed off from behind me.

I know this kid was trying to get on my good side, but he sure was making it hard on himself. I turned around and glared at him, telling him with my eyes that he better get me the hell out of here unless he wanted to have something coming for him.

Reluctantly he stood up and brushed off his pants. He took off the gear, and hooked it back to the line most likely to come back for it later. There was definitely something off about this. Suddenly my vision pin pointed black and I knew that I was blacking out.

_How?_

**PAGE BREAK**

My eyes fluttered open and I saw white about three feet from my face. It looked oddly familiar.

"Cam?"

My eyes widened as I heard Bex's voice. Was I back at home?

I sat up, watching as my blanket pooled around my hips. I _was _home.

"Zach dropped you off saying he saw you on the sidewalk face down. He said you had fainted. Are you okay?" I looked over to see her with concern in her face. Actual care.

I looked at her with emotionless eyes.

If I had learned one thing from my experience was it was that I could trust no one, even the people who pretended to like me. Zach had obviously lied, and for what reason I had no idea and probably would never know. However I did know that I received my reality check.

If Zach had been with the Circle of Cavan I would be dead.

I was slipping. I needed to get back in person, the emotionless rock.

I got off of my bed and went downstairs – I was hungry. I stopped dead to see everyone in the living room staring at me. Rachel, Corbin, Jonas -

Even Zach.

I looked back and walked into the kitchen, grabbing the plastic gallon of milk. I saw a sandwich and grabbed it, walking out of the kitchen and back up the stairs.

"Cameron, sweetie? Are you taking the whole carton of milk with you?" Rachel asked from the living room.

I continued walking back to my room in response.

"Damn, that was a good sandwich too," I heard Corbin mutter. I heard Jonas snicker as I walked into my room shut the door.

I was stunned to see Bex staring at the red dress, now hung on the hook. _'Please tell me she didn't read the note.' _I dropped the milk which gained Bex's attention.

"Cam, this is gorgeous," she said running her fingers over the silk fabric. "I wonder who sent it." My mind raced. It wasn't like I was about to give up my no speaking rule, but something to avoid finding the note was necessary.

"Whatever," she responded after a beat or two, realizing I was not about to speak. She looked down to see the milk on the floor. "Good thing that has a cap," she muttered, picking it up for me and handing it to me.

I broke from my trance and grabbed the milk, walking to the desk. I set everything on the desk and calmed myself down before taking a bite of the sandwich.

I knew Bex was approaching the way the hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

"I wish I was as pretty as you, Cam," I heard her sigh. I was hyper aware of her putting down my hood and stroking her hand through my hair.

I immediately flinched away from her, looking up at her.

Did the fool just _touch_ me?

"I wish you would talk to me," she told me quietly before exiting.

And now I felt terrible. _'How could someone make me feel so bad.'_

I sighed, no longer hungry. Instead I unscrewed the cap to the milk and slumped in the swirling chair kicking my feet up, putting the opening to my lips.

I had to shut myself down. I should run away if necessary.

I couldn't afford to allow anyone to get in now.


End file.
